CRINGE CRINGE CRINGE, my mum went to Global Village and bought a knee-high plaster Buddha that matches the décor, which she has put under the hall table. She and my sister (and my grandmother) are calling him 'Ping'. Have already gotten GTFO'd at for being a know-it-all while mentioning it to my sister, and been LOL'd at by my grandmother; currently debating worth of bringing it up with mum when she wakes up from her nap.

ETA: oh my godddddd that did not go well. sdfklj; jesus christ.

TWO RELATED THINGS:

1) I got my very first (proper, by which I mean 'more capacious than a floppy disk') USB thumb drive today, SHUT UP THIS IS A BFD. For no reason I can really understand, I am very resistant to certain forms of technology; I still don't own a (proper, more capacious than a floppy disk) mp3 player. Which brings me to -

2) USB thumb drive + work computer + repetitive work = music! UPLOAD ANYTHING. ANYTHING. However, if anyone happens to have a copy of 'Twist & Shout', internet cookies. Internet cookies + sexual favours for the Ferris Bueller's Day Off cover. Or 'Danke Schoen' of same. Why yes, I am watching FBDO at the moment; why do you ask?